Growing up is hard. I'd like to be mindlessly irrational again without a care in the world. I hate the changes i'm going through as i grow up. People used to comment on how fast i'd grown earlier, now the same people only talk about boyfriend's and marriage with a wink. I have this ardent feeling of rebellion grow inside me when quizzed about a boyfriend, why doesn't the thought of me being lesbian or maybe even staying a spinster all my life ever occur to them? I see myself as an old maid whose satisfied with life in many years-i get the feeling that such a statement won't go down too well with many people.
Iv grown from a freckled little brat in her late teens who would fight to get her way to a woman whose got nothing to fight for,plainly because i'm unsure of what i really want. There were times when i would find myself in a crowded room,wondering why i'm doing what i'm doing. I might sound like one of those cynical 20th century modernists at the moment but the fact is,i'm facing adulthood in the face and i don't like it.
At 21 i'm bothered about how soon i'l be seeing wrinkles appear on my face and every inch of fat that is bound to ornate my waist only too soon. I would worry myself to a headache on most days just thinking! But I'v decided to quit,everything that causes bodily harm to me has to walk. Why cause physical damage to myself when i'v got a whole life to look foward to. It's been a few days since i made up new resolutions and i plan on sticking to them!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
We all go through the same thing and trust me it doesn't get better three years down the line.
ReplyDeleteAnd kudos for the new resolution, we can both order mocktails now :)
or pretend:PP
ReplyDeletehey patridge
ReplyDeletenice stuff!
i do agree with u!
it is the body which now matters a lot to us!
that's why i am going for the "THING".
i have eventually decided to quit smoking too!
dunno bout drinkin cos its too common now, well then i counter myself with the question that
"so is smoking"
i think these are only excuses we give ourselves for the constant ageing process but if we believe what science has to say, we have to give up on a number of other things too....
and believe you me, the number is a huge one!
but i support ur decision, which is a strong one and wish you luck for abstaining from all this!
c u soon
me minus the .....
love
shbhmb
:)
Hmmmm ...quit smoking asap and at the age of 21
ReplyDeletepeople are thinking about marriage, you can postpone it at least for 4 years until then you can explore new things may be being a lesbian.
hehe 4yrs dsnt go dwn wt me too well..anothr 8yrs atleast..my partner agrees..but thn again,i mite jst xplore a bit;)
ReplyDelete